Friday, October 31, 2014


I've written a lot about marriage. This video about dating was made in the late 1970's. I still enjoy it every time I see it. It reminds me why I don't want to be a teenager again!  It also shows how friends can help each other and how we all need to learn social skills. Enjoy! (recognize Jimmy from the old Superman movie?)

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Are Mormon Women Dominated by the Men?

This video is the reflections of President Gordon B. Hinckley, our last prophet, after his wife, and partner of many years, had died a few months before. I met Margaret Pay Hinckley. She was an incredible woman. I can understand why he would miss her so much.

One woman informed me that married Mormon women's "main responsibility is to procreate and be a companion to her husband." Isn't that also man's main responsibility to have a family and be a good husband?  She also stated that though Mormon women "can contribute to decisions, men still make the decisions".

I'm glad she told me this because after 45 years as a woman in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon), I would have never guessed that I was a second class citizen dominated by my husband. What I have seen is

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Secrets of a Happy Marriage -- Common Goals

My husband and I are so different! Yes, having made eternal commitments to each other in the LDS temple has helped keep us going and trying over 42 years of marriage. We have, and continue to work at accepting and appreciating each others abilities and weaknesses. This has built a strong foundation to our marriage, but I wonder if it would work without common goals. As it is it is a challenge. He is always off and doing something while I sit and write. We have few interests in common (I try, but I just can't stay awake during a football game), but we do share the same major goals.

I think I would have a very difficult time being married to a person who

Monday, October 27, 2014

What do Mormon's believe about Justice, Mercy, and Grace?

I love this video. It explains how we need a mediator in our lives, and how our Savior meets both the demands of justice and our need for mercy.

A woman said recently that she didn't think she could walk with Christ when she died. Are any of us worthy to do so?  Can any of us grow and change on our own? I know I've tried, but like a person lost, I repeatedly end up back where started. If we try to become Christlike by ourselves, we will fail. We make mistakes everyday (almost every moment). Only through the power, the grace, which our Savior gives us, can we change. He can do anything. He has paid for all our mistakes. He has the power to help us change. All we need to do is try.

Friday, October 24, 2014

Enduring Love

I was so touched by this video (Enduring Love) that I cried. It reminded me so much of my husband. 
Some might ask how I can be sure my husband would care for me like this man cares for his disabled wife.  I know because my husband already has. There have been times when I have fallen to the floor and he has picked me up; times when I couldn't get food, walk, or talk. He has been there caring for me, and yes, he has even combed my hair for me. 

This week I wanted to be out and enjoy the fall color, but I can only walk a few feet at a time (see so my husband pushed me miles in a wheelchair along the paved river trail. I'm grateful that Addison's Disease is not a progressive disease (it's like diabetes; my adrenal glands don't work), but I'm even more grateful to have 
a husband with enduring love.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Are Mormons a Cult?

Some people think Mormons (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) are a cult. I don't know about you, but doesn't the word "cult" sound scary? I think of crazed charismatic leaders who mind control their followers to make them do horrible things. I associate things like kidnapping, abuse, and mass suicide with cults. I certainly wouldn't want to be a part of a group like that!

Mormons are known throughout the world as great humanitarians. We are some of the first people there to help after disasters and the last to leave. How could such a church with over 15 million members around the world be considered a "cult"?

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Mormon Women's Perfectionism and Prescription Drug Use

This is a video about a Mormon woman, a champion, imperfect mother, and a person who has suffered postpartum depression.

A couple of friends asked me about a news report which commented on the high level of prescription drug use among women who are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon). Their claim was that the higher use of anti-depressants by women in Utah is the result of the stress of having larger families and from trying to live up to an expectation created by the Mormon church to be "perfect".

I began to ask about this problem and received conformation that many women are taking prescription drugs for depression. Why? Some claim that trying to be perfect causes this depression. This puzzles me since my personality type is a very strong idealist. Wouldn't I feel more pressured than most women? What is really going on here?

Friday, October 17, 2014

My Place in Mormon Culture - Leavening the Lump

vase of red roses
“For the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.” (Bible, Old Testament - 1 Samuel 16:7)  This poster has a lot of meaning for me.

Yes, I really think there is a higher percentage of traditional people in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, than out of the Church. There are probably more orderly people in most religions and organizations since they are the people who set up and maintain society on the whole. The fact is that about forty-five percent of the American population are these diligent souls. As much as creative people complain about their inflexibility, we need them.  Orderly people are the bulwark of society, but where do we fit in?

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Is the "Mormon" Church Traditional?

I like this video where a Church leader calls us to come to the "higher ground".

Some people see The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as just another traditional church where people follow the beliefs only because their parents and grandparents did. Since half of American society is composed of "orderly souls" who work to maintain the good in their society, that is partly a true statement.  Orderly, traditional people are the mainstay of all societies. Though we creative souls complain about their rigidity, they provide order and stability to life. Are they very flexible?  No.  Are they open to new ideas?  Only when it is forced upon them.  Do they ever want anything to change?  Definitely not!  Do they multiply rules on how to implement every Gospel principle? Yes, in endless multiplicity!

You could almost write a code book; for example

Wednesday, October 15, 2014


I like this video. Yes, we have been protected many times, but sometimes we are not. I have severe health problems. Even though all does not go as we want it to go, we can still have peace.

As I look at the gaping hole and crumbling glass where his truck window used to be, I know my husband was protected. Whatever hit the window, did not hit him. He held steady. Even a small swerve on the freeway in his large business box truck could have cost many lives, but here he was still with me.

I thought of another time, when we were first married

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Secrets of a Happy Marriage -- Acceptance and Appreciation

I like this video of different people expressing love for each other. Gives you something to think about.

Ok, if you each are committed to your relationship and to loving each other, you are off to a good start. What next? Actually, the real key is love. Commitment is a part of love and so is acceptance. You can't really love someone if you don't accept and appreciate them for who they are.

My husband and I have put acceptance to the test. We are so different from each other! He is an

Monday, October 13, 2014

More Secrets of a Happy Marriage-- Commitment

This is a moving video about not giving up on your marriage.

It is true what I said before, that love is a decision of the heart. Wanting to love is important, but I thought a few "how to's" might be appropriate. Some might say, "but I loved him (or her) and it didn't work out".  Maybe I should explain what I mean by love. I try to help him be the best person he can be and achieve what he most wants to do. Mainly I help his business be successful, help him relate to people, and help him build a good marriage. He helps me by handling most of the details (cleaning, finances, shopping), so I can write. He said, "Anyone who can write like you, shouldn't be doing housework." See why I love him!

Was it always so wonderful? No. We both came from broken homes, had never seen a happy marriage, and had no idea how to make one. Our first few years were pretty pathetic, but we were determined to keep working at it. One of the most important things which pulled us through is:

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Thursday, October 9, 2014

The Secret of being Happily Married for 42 years.

I love this old video, Johnny Lingo. It shows the change love can make in a life. He reminds me of my husband who has helped me become the person I am now.

I can remember being married only two years and wondering if we would make it to our fourth year anniversary. Now we have been married for 42 years and it just keeps getting better! Some wonder if we just found our "soul mate".  Others declare that they would have a good marriage if only their husband was like mine (unfortunately no man has ever declared that he wants a wife like me, but I'm going to ignore that) . I know they are serious, so I try not to burst out laughing!

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

How Does a Creative Person Keep House?

I have always loved the story of the two sisters, Mary and Martha. When Martha complains to the Lord that Mary isn't helping enough with the housework, the Lord replies that Mary has chosen the better part. I see myself as a Mary.

Since I have no intention of ever becoming  a "busy little homemaker", is my home a mess? It is true that I don't weed, mow, vacuum, shampoo rugs or furniture, polish furniture or silverware, or "deep clean". I spend my day writing and love it. I also have major allergies and must have a dust and mold free home, and I do. My house is very clean and orderly. You may wonder how I can do this. It's really not that hard. I just decided to

New Movie - Meet the Mormons

This movie shows some very interesting Mormons. I goes beyond stereotypes. I'm looking forward to seeing it. To request it to come to your area so to

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Poems instead of Casseroles

How does a creative person fit into the busy orderly world out there? We don't. We just sort of slip out of the main stream and make our own quiet little eddie. It's a great place. There is time to think, feel, enjoy life, and time to create beauty.

From my quiet spot, I watch others whizzing by. Though appreciating their accomplishments, I have no desire to be a part of this madly rushing main stream. Does this mean I have nothing to do with other people? How does a creative person still be a part of their society?

Friday, October 3, 2014

Does a Creative Person Fit in Mormon Culture?

I joined the Church in California, went to BYU, got married, and had two small before I confronted "Mormon Culture". We had moved to a small bedroom community near Provo, Utah, and were enjoying have a home of our own. Then it began.

General Conference Gives Direction

I've heard that #LDSconf is supposed to take you somewhere. I'm trying to learn about hashtags so I thought I'd try one out. I'm putting this in again since I'm not sure about hastags. I'm trying to catch up with technology but it is a struggle for me.

I'm looking forward to the talks tomorrow. Besides messages of hope and direction for my life, I also am strengthened just to see and hear the leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. They have turned their lives over to the Lord and lost themselves. They are loving and more concerned with others than how they appear to others. It give me hope that I can be a better person. General Conference is a time to make a new start - like New Years. I love it!

"Glorious" music video

The song “Glorious” is sung by David Archuleta in the new movie Meet the Mormons that is coming exclusively to theaters the weekend of October 10. (David is not in the movie, but the song is featured in the movie.)
I really enjoyed this song and thought you might too. 

Thursday, October 2, 2014

You Never Know

I really identified with this video. It says something women need to be reminded of. Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing any good, or if I have just made a mess of the day. This woman

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Mormon Temple Video

This video not only explains the purpose of temples, but tells what happens there and shows pictures of the inside. I look forward to going to the temple because

Purpose of Life

I really like this video and identified with the confusion of the young man. We really are in the middle of life and don't remember what came before and we don't see now what will happen in the future. The scriptures have helped me to not feel so lost and to have